MY decision

I decided to take this approach from now onwards after some time contemplating

I feel that as a fellow coursemate, i need to inform you whenever you do something wrong and silly like that

I rather be considered the evil one or the one with the so-called bad mouth for now.

But I'm really really doing this for your own good.

You will never know you are wrong, unless someone tells you. And I am willing to be the someone

You may develop an animosity towards me, but I rather you do, than I watch you cross over to the bad side like that, and remain silent

You were so much of a better person last time

Maybe, you dont need to return to who you were, but you should at least change for the better

Life is about becoming a becoming a better person.

I feel i dont believe in being who you are and everyone else must accept it.

Of course, that concept is applicable to a certain stage, but it should not be used as an excuse to run away from the truth that there are problems with you attitude.

I am willing to accept your physical and other things that cant be changed.

But

for things that can be changed, and should be changed, I am unwilling to compromise

Please do not use the concept of "I'm just beinf who I am" to run away from things

I killed a person

Its reaching the end of semester 1.

After spending 2 semesters here, i would say that life gets more interesting day by day.

so many bittersweet memories we shared together =)

such fond memories

SIGH

Despite that, I still cant bring myself to ingnore the bitter moments that clouded them

Today i woke up feeling terrible and guilty.

I was invovled in a conspiracy against a certain someone.

Someone who is often judged unilaterally.

Someone who used to be a great person.

Someone who used to help me regardless of the situation.

But, that person has changed.

His desperation to vye for popularity and seek attention became his undoing.

The fact that, there are many other things he did that pissed everyone, booked him a

one-way ticket to become an outcast.

Now, he is like a tiny island besieged by us, rough oceans.

But

he still tries his best to fit in no matter what.

His attitude sickens me, but his perserverance amazes me.

The fact that he is human like all of us, shows that he need friends. But everyone, including me are turning our backs against him.

Then, i question myself,

Why did I opt to exile him?

why couldnt i just accept him for who he is, or just help him change?

Maybe i still lack compassion

Maybe i still need to learn how to practise metta

SIGH

I dont know how I can stand being in his shoes; carving a fake smile on his face to hide his sorrow, pretending he is still part of the family despite knowing that he was already disowned, and facing people who refuse to face him.

No man is an island. And no man deserves a treatment of that sort.

but his sickening attitude is really distasteful, and it annoys me to no end

SIGH

this is a post, full of contradictions.

My heart tells me to avoid him, but my conscience tells me to befriend him

What should I do now?

I really dont know

Tolong lah T.T

Who has a car???????

i really want to go to Cheras pasar malam next wednesday.

Its the biggest pasar malam in Malaysia

About 1 km long

PLease!!!!!!!

Please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i really need to go.............. T.T

I want to eat the taiwan pizzas, penang asam laksa, ice blended honeydew, and so many more there...

A new moon in 2012

2012 was an underated movie for me.

For a movie that kept the level of suspense so high throughout 3 hours, and still managed to infuse so many sub-themes and moral values, it should be receiving more publicity than it is already enjoying

Despite being such an emotional and solemn movie, it managed to slip some humor very effectively in between.

The character development was extraordinarily good for a Hollywood movie

Definitely the best movie so far, this year (I'm still reserving judgementns for Avatar)

Watched it in Midvalley

Till today, the tickets are still being sold at an astonishing speed

New Moon was utterly dissapointing and way overated.

The pace was way too slow for me.

It didnt appear to be anything like an action-romance movie as it was publicised.

It was just pure romance.

The wolf-figthing scene was a letdown

And the fact that the wolfs look more cute than aggresive, was really frustrating.

Watched it in Pavillion.

SO was the movie that bad?

well,

About 15 people left their seats in the middle of the movie

(nobody leaves their seats in cinemas)

Chances are, if you are a girl, you might like it, coz of all the romance and shirtless men

But

if you are a boy, I sugggest you think twice before watching it.

my life now

this is definitely a boring semester

SIGH

I'm going back to taiping for Kathina

I'm sorry

i realised that i have really turned into a vindictive and bitter person.

after the JPA incident, i promised myself that i will never be defeated again and i will always stand up to those who oppose me.

These really led to a series of unpleasant events that really changed me

I became a sadistic freak

I was consumded by grudge

I Fought back at everything

I returned hatred in triple

That small incident has really turned me into a beast

I really threw away my human heart

i was inhumane

you think i'm exaggerating?

think again

Last time, if i were to see beggars on the street, i will take out my wallet without hesitation

But now,

i will think that, "Why must i give my money to you? why must i help you when nobody helped me when i needed and deserved it?"

I know

I have became and kiasu and kiasi idiot

I hurt people i know on purpose, and i feel happy doing it because i wanted to inflict the pain that was casted upon me, on them, to show them how it made me feel

you can say what you want about me being a lunatic monster

I dont mind

Because i agree with you

i really hope that i can change

the desire to prove my worthy has conquered me inside out

even my sister has been complaining how insensitive i have become

and no matter how i hate that, i have to agree with her

So now that i realised, i really want to change

and liberate myself from this silly vortex of spite