Friday, September 25, 2009

I'm sorry

i realised that i have really turned into a vindictive and bitter person.
after the JPA incident, i promised myself that i will never be defeated again and i will always stand up to those who oppose me.
These really led to a series of unpleasant events that really changed me
I became a sadistic freak
I was consumded by grudge
I Fought back at everything
I returned hatred in triple
That small incident has really turned me into a beast
I really threw away my human heart
i was inhumane
you think i'm exaggerating?
think again
Last time, if i were to see beggars on the street, i will take out my wallet without hesitation
But now,
i will think that, "Why must i give my money to you? why must i help you when nobody helped me when i needed and deserved it?"
I know
I have became and kiasu and kiasi idiot
I hurt people i know on purpose, and i feel happy doing it because i wanted to inflict the pain that was casted upon me, on them, to show them how it made me feel
you can say what you want about me being a lunatic monster
I dont mind
Because i agree with you
i really hope that i can change
the desire to prove my worthy has conquered me inside out
even my sister has been complaining how insensitive i have become
and no matter how i hate that, i have to agree with her
So now that i realised, i really want to change
and liberate myself from this silly vortex of spite